Dating can be an exciting adventure, but not all new couples are lucky enough to share reciprocated feelings. If you’ve ever found yourself dating someone who likes you more than you like them, you’ll appreciate how tricky it can be to navigate. Here are 18 helpful ways to date someone who might be feeling the love a bit more than you.
Acknowledge Their Feelings
First and foremost, recognize their feelings for what they are. Acknowledging that they like you more shows that you respect their emotions and understand the dynamics at play. That doesn’t necessarily mean you should communicate these feelings straight away, just be sure that you’ve got the right end of the stick before having a one-on-one with them.
Be Honest About Your Feelings
Honesty is crucial in any relationship. If you’re not on the same page emotionally, you might need to gently communicate your feelings. If you want to keep moving forward with them, it’s worth asking for some patience and understanding. Being upfront prevents misunderstandings and sets clear expectations.
Take Things Slowly
Pacing the relationship allows both of you to get comfortable with each other’s feelings. If they’re confessing their undying love for you every five minutes and you’re not feeling it, you probably need to slow things down. It gives you time to catch up emotionally if that’s possible or at least to better understand the depth of your feelings.
Focus on Friendship
Many new couples underestimate the element of friendship that strong relationships require. They can easily get caught up in the ‘making things work’ narrative and overlook the journey. Building a strong friendship can form a solid foundation for your relationship. It allows you to appreciate each other’s company without the pressure of intense romantic expectations.
Set Boundaries
Establishing boundaries ensures that both parties feel comfortable. It prevents one person from feeling overwhelmed or the other from feeling neglected. If you need to slow things down, make sure you communicate that. It’s better to get these things sorted from the outset than cause upset down the line.
Show Appreciation
It’s easy to grow frustrated if your feelings aren’t on the same page. Unless you’re certain that they’re not for you, let them know you appreciate their feelings and the efforts they make. Genuine appreciation creates a much more positive atmosphere and reassures them that their emotions are valued.
Don’t Lead Them On
If you’re unsure about your feelings, avoid words or actions that could be misinterpreted as deeper affection. Leading someone on can cause unnecessary hurt and confusion and you’re likely to find yourself in a messy situation. Equally, if you know you don’t want to continue, make sure you’re open and honest about it.
Give it Time
Just because you’re in different time zones with your feelings doesn’t mean that it won’t change. Feelings can develop over time. Allow yourself the space to see if your feelings grow. Sometimes, initial uncertainty can evolve into a deeper connection. You’ll gain a sense of whether this is something you want to investigate further. Trust your gut instinct.
Maintain Your Independence
Sometimes, people can throw everything into an early relationship for the wrong reasons. If you’re not feeling the same way as they are, this can lead to mixed signals. Keep pursuing your interests and activities to maintain a balanced relationship and ensure you don’t feel pressured to reciprocate feelings out of a sense of obligation.
Encourage Their Independence
As with yourself, encourage them to continue their hobbies and spend time with friends. This prevents them from becoming overly dependent on you for emotional fulfillment and allows them some time away from you. If things don’t work out, it’s better to know that they have a supportive circle.
Communicate Regularly
Regular communication helps both of you stay on the same page. It allows you to discuss feelings, concerns, and your individual and mutual hopes for the relationship. Don’t let conversations become taboo, you’ll only regret it later on.
Reassess Your Relationship
Now and again it’s sensible to reassess the relationship. Things change all the time and what you’re feeling one day might drastically change the following week. This self-reflection can guide your decisions about the future of the relationship, and you’ll understand if the imbalance is lessening or worsening.
Seek Mutual Activities
It’s important to engage in activities that you both enjoy as a way of assessing your feelings. Shared experiences can strengthen your bond and may help in balancing your emotional connection. Only when you’ve experienced things together can you make a fair assessment.
Avoid Comparisons
Everyone can be guilty of it but don’t compare your current relationship with past ones where the feelings were more balanced. Every relationship is unique and should be appreciated for its individual qualities. If all partners were the same, it wouldn’t be much fun, would it?
Be Supportive
You don’t have to be wholly committed to one another to support them in their endeavors and dreams. Showing that you care about their personal growth can help balance the emotional scales, and make you closer as a couple.
Check In With Yourself
Regularly evaluate your feelings. Understanding your emotions better ensures you’re honest with both you and your partner. If you have a nagging feeling that you’re not embracing things, it might be time to move on. You never know, you might suddenly realize your feelings have strengthened.
Consider the Long Term
Think about the future of the relationship. Do you see yourself as a couple? Can you visualize doing things together? If you don’t foresee your feelings growing to match theirs, it might be kinder to part ways sooner rather than later. If you’re open to the idea, take each day as it comes and go with the flow.
Avoid Committing to Long-Term Plans
When couples first meet, it’s always tempting to start discussing plans. We can even get caught up in the wave of excitement and over-commit to things. If you’re ensure about your feelings, communicate that you’d rather take each date on an individual basis. There’s no point in discussing that exotic holiday in two years and building their hopes up.
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